Five completely offensive rides that should be closed immediately
In light of the closure of Fear:VR at Canada’s Wonderland, Great America and Knott’s – after a protest from the President of the Orange County chapter of the National Alliance of Mental Health – a person who admitted he never actually experienced the attraction for himself – Great American Thrills is proud to present to you five more offensive rides that should be shut down, torn down and never spoken of again.
(If you haven’t already gathered, this is all sarcasm – please be offended if you did not get the joke already).
1.) Seven Dwarfs Mine Train, Walt Disney World
Offends: Little People
As our good friend Eric the Actor from the Howard Stern Show always used to say, the correct term is “Little People.” Who thought to name a ride after seven height-challenged people, and then make then sing as if they were merry? Oh – it was a famous KIDS movie? So we’ve inoculated our children that it’s okay to say this, too?!?
2.) The Demon, Great America
Offends: Church-going folk
Sadly, this is the only one on our list that played out in real life. Turns out back in the 1980’s, people were not down with the idea of theming a coaster after a devil-like apparition that was eating guests randomly. Thankfully, people got over themselves and not only is the ride still around – but it tweets, too!
3.) All water rides
Offends: Aquaphobiacs
Seriously – how can you in good conscious place all that water around a log and let people float in it? What a disgusting insult to people who fear water…
4.) Gold Striker & Gold Rusher, Great America & Six Flags Magic Mountain
Offends: Mine Workers
How can either of these roller coasters accurately portray the savage life endured by miners, all in the search for rare minerals…they should be ashamed of themselves.
5.) Top Thrill Dragster, Cedar Point
Offends: Decent people
Have you seen that thing? It looks like a giant wanker. A hot dog. A gentleman’s “special region.” We can’t have our kids grow up in a world like this…
You see how slippery this slope is? If you don’t like something about a park – just do what everyone else does – don’t support it. Don’t impose your beliefs on them, it only makes you part of the problem…
Great America and Knott’s pull Fear:VR from Haunt lineups after criticism from mental health advocates
After a name change before it opened to the public and just three days of operation, both California’s Great America and Knott’s Berry Farm removed their “Fear:VR” attractions from their Halloween Haunts after mental health advocates in Southern California cried foul.
In their letter to Cedar Fair, the President of the Orange County chapter of the National Alliance on Mental Illness said, “The attraction adds to the hurtful, dehumanizing, discriminatory, prejudicial, insensitive, offensive and stigmatizing of mental illness. (We believe) it is in the poorest taste that mental illness stereotypes are being used by entertainment sources for commercial gain.”
Cedar Fair – corporate owner of both parks – issued a statement late Tuesday night:
“For nine years we have delivered unique and immersive haunted experiences to our fans and loyal guests. Our evening attractions are designed to be edgy, and are aimed at an adult-only audience. Over the past week we have heard from a number of people expressing their concern that one of our temporary, Halloween attractions – FearVR – is hurtful to those who suffer from mental illnesses. Contrary to some traditional and social media accounts, the attraction’s story and presentation were never intended to portray mental illness. As it is impossible to address both concerns and misconceptions in the Halloween time frame, at this time we have decided to close the attraction.”
For those of us who DID experience it, the consensus was clear: it WAS scary as all hell. It was a better, overall use of VR than on a coaster – because you didn’t know what to expect. It truly immersed you in the program. But – was it offensive, insensitive and stigmatizing? And more importantly, should that matter when it comes to a fantasy event like Halloween Haunt?
On the one hand – it’s a Halloween event. It’s supposed to be a little “off.” Hell, Knott’s regularly MURDERS and HANGS celebrities (in effigy) twice a night in Calico Square. Yet, you don’t hear from those who decry the death penalty or for those wanting more gun control – because everyone knows it’s fake. It’s built into the event.
I don’t remember the “hospital” in Fear:VR focusing on mental health in the storyline. We went into the room for an “ocular” exam. There was a backstory about a young girl who was possessed in some way, but it was never made clear that the facility we were at was anything more than a regular hospital.
On the other hand, is mental health a huge stigma in our society? Absolutely. Could this attraction possibly play into those stigmas? I suppose you could say, “yes” given the reality many interpreted it as. But then again, the whole Haunt experience is one big stigma / stereotype when you think about it. Are all farmers murderous, un-educated hicks? Then Cornstalkers must go. Are all clowns homicidal maniacs? Killer Klown Town has to go too – it could be offensive to genuine, circus performers. Is a hospital full of half-dead zombies going to trying and kill you if you check into a mental clinic? No, it isn’t.
Cedar Point tried a similar attraction a few year ago – and it met the exact same criticism and ultimate demise. How the company thought that in CALIFORNIA of all places that this would fly, is a question for someone above my pay grade. One must also wonder if the park’s “INsanitarium” maze might be in the cross-hairs as a result of all this activity.
The other question that I don’t think we can answer is this: Where do we stop with this? I don’t claim to have the answer – I don’t think any of us do.
Recently, a lot of people were pretty “upset” that In N’ Out Burger didn’t offer a vegetarian burger. They made a petition that got a ton of play online and loads of media attention. Yet, do you see meat eaters going into vegan or vegetarian restaurants, demanding beef? But I digress, let’s get back to the parks…
There is one thing I think that we CAN agree on: there is difference between fantasy and reality – and there’s no reality in a park’s Halloween event.
None.
The chainsaws don’t have chains, the monsters have no magical powers and all of the blood is fake. Are we laughing at the dead, the murderers among us or the worst of our society by celebrating Halloween like this? Of course not. It’s just fantasy.
What do you think? Should the parks have shut down the attraction, or is this just a massive blow up for nothing? Let me know in the comments section below – but please keep it civil:
The Seven Days of Arrow Development – Day 7
Today’s post is of Ron Toomer, Arrow’s first engineer and the man behind some of the most iconic steel coasters ever built. While the company may be best remembered for their rides – remember that without the people behind them, they would have most certainly never have existed.
Be sure to LIKE, COMMENT or SHARE with the amusement park fans in your life – and don’t forget that “The Legacy of Arrow Development” premieres THIS SATURDAY at the Montgomery Theater in San Jose. Tickets are still available here: bit.ly/ArrowTixSJ
See you there tomorrow evening!
The Seven Days of Arrow Development – Day 6
Today’s post is of X at Six Flags Magic Mountain – the world’s first 4th Dimension coaster and the last coaster Arrow ever built.
Be sure to LIKE, COMMENT or SHARE with the amusement park fans in your life – and don’t forget that “The Legacy of Arrow Development” premieres THIS SATURDAY at the Montgomery Theater in San Jose. Tickets are still available here: bit.ly/ArrowTixSJ
See you there on Saturday!
The Seven Days of Arrow Development – Day 5
Today’s post is of Magnum XL-200, the world’s first hypercoaster (200+ feet) and a throwback to the out and back wooden coasters of the 1920’s. It’s also considered by many as the moment the “coaster wars” officially began.
Be sure to LIKE, COMMENT or SHARE with the amusement park fans in your life – and don’t forget that “The Legacy of Arrow Development” premieres THIS SATURDAY at the Montgomery Theater in San Jose. Tickets are still available here: bit.ly/ArrowTixSJ
See you there on Saturday!
The Seven Days of Arrow Development – Day 4
Today’s post is of the Corkscrew – the world’s first modern looping roller coaster:
Be sure to LIKE, COMMENT or SHARE with the amusement park fans in your life – and don’t forget that “The Legacy of Arrow Development” premieres THIS SATURDAY at the Montgomery Theater in San Jose. Tickets are still available here: bit.ly/ArrowTixSJ
See you there on Saturday!
Remembering Gary Owens
We lost a legend in media this week.
Gary Owens, famed radio announcer, TV presenter and voiceover actor, died at the age of 80 on Friday. You may not know the man, but you certainly know the voice.
Like many in my generation, we were introduced to Mr. Owens not by his work on the radio or television, but on his very popular “Dinosaurs!” VHS tapes.
So what’s the amusement park connection? Well, both he and Eric Boardman took a trip on Kingdom of the Dinosaurs at Knott’s Berry Farm – and here it is for you to recall…and to enjoy. With Voyage to the Iron Reef now opening in it’s place – it’s a great look back with a true media legend.
Thanks for the memories, Gary.
And here’s some raw footage from the episode, featuring the park as well:
The Knott’s Berry Farm Shopping Pass is the Amusement Industry’s Best Kept Secret
If I told you you could legally enter a theme park without paying, you’d probably call me nuts. But that’s just the case at Knott’s Berry Farm, thanks to their unique, “Shopper’s Pass.”
Logo courtesy of Knott’s Berry Farm – Cedar Fair, L.P.
The Shopper’s Pass is a timed-entry to Knott’s, originally intended for someone to enter to either purchase or peruse the park for something to buy within a limited time. In this case, 45 minutes. Say for instance you wanted to get an item the night before, but forgot to – this pass allows you to grab it before you head back home.
And as great as it is for that, there’s a second use that gaining popularity. If you’re willing to roll the dice on short lines and think you’re a decent power walker – you can go into the park, ride one or two attractions and then bolt back to Guest Services before your time is up.
Xcelerator at Knott’s Berry Farm. Photo by Kris Rowberry. All rights reserved.
Now, there’s a BIG catch to this too-good-to-be-true admission: if you fail to return in the allotted 45 minutes – even by just one second – you’re getting charged for a full day’s admission. How does the park guarantee that? They’ll ask for a deposit that’s equal to your full-day admission up front, fully refundable upon your timely return.
If you’re easily distracted or forgetful, this is not a good ticket option for you. Plus, Knott’s is worth AT LEAST a full day’s worth of exploring and riding.
The good news: If you are one of those forgetful types, you can always take that paid admission and apply it to an annual pass in the same building. That way, you can spend as much time as you want in the park for an entire year!
But, if you’re looking to do some shopping at Knott’s and are in a time crunch, the “Shopper’s Pass” is the best kept non-secret in the amusement industry.
Top Five Amusement Park Mistakes
Parks are run by humans – which means that sometimes (although rarely) they will make mistakes. It’s human nature, after all. Sometimes, taking a risk on a prototype pays off. (Look at how well Magnum XL-200 did!) However, in these cases, things didn’t quite work out as well as the parks had hoped.
That being said, let’s take a look back at five of some of the biggest “not-so-stellar” moves made by amusement and theme parks. Got one you think should be added to the list/ Tell us on social media, or leave a comment below!
5.) VertiGO; Thrill Shot – Cedar Point; Six Flags Magic Mountain
When park fans first saw this mammoth attraction, complete with it’s programmable ride sequence, many of us shouted, “…shut up and take my money!” Unfortunately, stress cracks that were discovered in the models and a snapped pillar in Ohio led the attraction to completely disappear to almost as little fanfare as it debuted to.
4.) Silver Bullet, Knott’s Berry Farm
Talk about a more appropriate name – many park fans will argue that the addition of this custom B&M inverted coaster nearly killed the charm from “America’s 1st Theme Park.” Plopped right in the middle of the park, the ride straddles several themed areas, and necessitated the moving of a church on the property as well as the original Berry Stand and vines that made Knott’s famous.
Built in an apparent attempt to compete with Six Flags Magic Mountain, Silver Bullet was the second to last major attraction built / purchased under the Kinzel-era of Cedar Fair’s management. Since then, the company has shifted, to re-investing in the parks’ classic attractions, bringing back the nostalgia and charm that made Knott’s the friendlier and less-crowded alternative to nearby Disneyland.
3.) Stealth – Paramount’s Great America
Announced in 1999 to much fanfare, this expensive, $17 million prototype attraction gave riders the sensation of flying…if they were willing to wait up to three hours on a GOOD day.
However, the ride was removed after only three years of operation, due to high maintenance needs, large amounts of downtime and that very low throughput / capacity. The second station was never built to completion, which allowed riders to bake in the sun for up to ten minutes while another train was dispatched. Quite simply, the ride never lived up to nor operated at it’s original potential.
Originally committed to several models of the ride for their parks, Paramount Parks allegedly pulled the contract on Vekoma after the disappointing results from Stealth. The area the ride sat on became the “Boomerang Bay Waterpark” but sharp eyes can still spot footers for Stealth in the Yankee Harbor area of the park.
2.) The Bat – Kings Island
Even the masters have their mistakes. For years, Anton Schwarzkopf had been designing a swinging, suspended coaster. Unfortunately, Anton’s skills with fabrication and design didn’t translate to running a business, and the company went bankrupt before “The Bat” could be finished. In stepped Arrow Development, who finished the ride.
However, high bank forces contributed to very high track maintenance, which eventually shut the ride down. It was replaced by another Arrow creation, the multi-loop “Vortex.”
Arrow would go on to build several suspended coasters of their own, one of which made a return to Kings Island, named “Top Gun.” Ironically, the park renamed and rebranded it to “the Bat” in 2014.
1.) Son of Beast – Paramount’s Kings Island
The looping wooden coaster. Once the holy grail of coaster-dom; now, it’s the “next big thing” when it comes to parks. But back in 2000, it was still a “work in progress.” True, the ride worked fine, but the heavy trains custom designed to transition between the steel loop and wooden track tore up the 7,000+ feet of track on the ride, to the point it became unbearable to ride.
Removing the loop and adding lighter, Gerstlauer trains didn’t help, either. The coaster was shuttered for several years and then eventually torn down in favor of a custom, record breaking B&M inverted coaster, “Banshee.”
What do you think? Are there other “not-so-great” moves that are worth noting? Tell us what you think on our social media feeds or leave a comment with video clip below!
(*All videos featured in this article are copyright of their respective owners. No ownership is implied*)
Planet Snoopy Expansion Coming to California’s Great America in 2015
After a lengthy wait, California’s Great America finally announced their 2015 attraction – an expansion of Planet Snoopy and significant renovation of the Kidzville area.
According to the park, “…three new Planet Snoopy rides will be introduced and be in place for opening day in 2015 when Great America begins its magical 39th season. The entire area known formally known as KidZville will be morphed into the expanded Planet Snoopy.”
These rides include: Joe Cool’s Gr8Sk8, Peanuts 500 and Snoopy’s Space Buggies. Gr8Sk8 will be an interactive ride atop Snoopy’s giant skateboard with the feeling of going off the edge. Peanuts 500 lets racers zoom around the track and slingshot around the track ends, while Snoopy’s Space Buggies will lift astronauts into the air for a gravity defying lunar landing.
“Great America is known for its thrill rides, but we pride ourselves on a being a park for everyone. Enhancing Planet Snoopy and introducing three attractions parents can ride with children adds to our inclusive family atmosphere,” said Great America Vice President and General Manager Raul Rehnborg.
Sharp-eyed observers to the park had noticed a new tombstone appear in the “Ride Graveyard” section of Haunt this year – indicating the change:
Photo by: Thrills by the Bay (Used with permission)
This is a welcome addition for the little tikes that visit the park. The Kidzville brand had been largely unchanged since it’s introduction in 1999. The area was well overdue for a refresh, and these rides (originally from Knott’s) will certainly do the trick.
Now, there undoubtedly be some of you that say, “That’s all – first a new Pavilion area, now this?!?” but hear me out:
The Great America Pavilion has been, by all accounts – a stunning success. The park needed to re-invest in it’s own infrastructure to give a more year-round ability – and the Pavilion has done just that. It’s a new, modern facility that can attract new groups to spend their money there. It’s also a long term investment that will pay off for decades, especially with the 49ers next door.
2016 will be the park’s 40th season. (Opened in May, 1976). Traditionally, parks like to “go big” for significant dates, as it’s more marketable. An expansion / refresh of a kids area is a relatively economical new product, that sets the stage for a much larger capital investment in 2016. Park historians will recall that when Kidzville debuted in 1999, “Project Stealth” followed soon thereafter – a $17 million investment.
Also, take a look at the other recent capital investments in Cedar Fair parks: two have received entirely new entrance plazas, capped off with (you guessed it) massive coasters. California’s Great America is one of two parks in the Cedar Fair chain to not have a high capacity, long length hyper / giga coaster (non-looping, steel coaster over 200 feet tall). The park does have a height limit of 224 feet, but also has plenty of space inside the park to build on.
Let the waiting game and speculation begin!
Disney Bans Unaccompanied Kids
After over 55 years in business, “the Happiest Place on Earth” is no longer a playground for unsupervised tweens.
Sorry tweens, Disney Parks are for families, not you!
Disney yesterday, announced that they would no longer allow children under the age of 14 to roam the park without parental accompaniment.
At first, it SOUNDS terrible, borderline insane. I mean, how could a Disney Park ban KIDS? Wasn’t that the point they were built, so we could all be children at heart? But then, after reading into it a bit more, not only can I understand the move – I APPLAUD IT.
Consider for a moment, the last time you went to, say a Six Flags. Their marketing is heavily focused on the under 18 market, especially for season pass sales. Remember all those annoying tweens in the park – blasting their cell phones on speaker so that EVERYONE in line could hear their favorite song? Cutting in line, being generally “rebellious” (or at least what that generation thinks is rebellious?).
After you’ve just paid $119 per PERSON to experience the Disneyland Resort for JUST ONE DAY – do you really want to have that same experience?
I didn’t think so. And neither should you.
For some Disney parks are going to be harder to get into than Club 33!
Let’s face it, some parents use amusement parks as a de-facto babysitter. It’s apparently a $600 investment (Annual Pass approximate cost) in sanity it’s much easier for the Mom and Dad to dump you off at an amusement park for the day, than deal with your pre-pubescent problems. This is exactly what Disney wants to stop, even if it means sacrificing a few Annual Passholders to Knott’s Berry Farm, a few miles up. “the 5.”
It’s rare that a park will turn down easy money (Holiday World in Indiana does it all the time by offering free parking, free soda and free sunscreen) but considering how much The Walt Disney Company made in the time it took you to read the word “DISNEY” in this sentence – they can afford to purge themselves of such a small (but noisy and noticeable) market group.
And hey, since you can’t dump your kids off at the park anymore, you’ll just have to buy a ticket for yourself and – GASP – try to enjoy a little together-time as a family. Ahhh!
Remember when that was the point of going to Disneyland?
A Bit More Planning…
Alas, you’re one step closer to enjoying a day out in your local amusement or thrill park – but there’s still a bit more pre-planning that you must accomplish…exactly what are you going to bring to the park with you? If you’ve read my blog thus far, the answer shouldn’t surprise you…
It goes without saying, but if the weather report says the high temperature is expected to be above 70 degrees – pass on the pants.
Shorts will dry faster than pants on water rides and keep you comfortable throughout the day.option.
Too often, people misjudge the weather and end up passing out in line because of a heat stroke or exhaustion. The $3.50 bottles of water in the queue lines certainly don’t help the situation, either! So do yourself a favor, go with shorts when the weather’s over 70F.
If you absolutely have to, pack a jacket and pair of pants and leave them in the car! You can always go back to the car if you or anyonein your party gets too cold. There is no reason to lug all that, for lack of a better term – CRAP – around all day. It will inevitably tire you out much faster than a quick walk to the parking lot.
There’s also the option of a multiple-use day locker within the park boundaries, which is a good investment if the parking lot is a significant distance away from the entrance. An example of this would be Six Flags Discoery Kingdom, where even a brisk walk from your car to the entrance is fifteen minutes.
Nearly all parks today do not allow loose articles on their larger rides and attractions. The reasoning behind it is simple – it’s a major safety issue, as flying objects can seriously injure patrons or disrupt safe operation of the ride. In fact, on Knott’s Berry Farms’ “Jaguar!” roller coaster, a loose jacket jammed the wheels of the coaster, stalling it midway through the circuit.
That being said, if you absolutely have to bring loose items into the park, make sure they’re just the absolute bare necessities: your wallet, possibly a small camera, sunglasses and maybe a cell phone. That’s it.
Purses, backpacks and bags – although convenient – will only add to your wait times getting into the park, as security will be poking, prodding and rummaging through them, looking for unsafe items. It will also inevitably raise your stress levels as you attempt to keep track of all your stuff as you leave it on the ride platform while on the larger attractions.
Plus, there’s no reason to bring your iPod, iPad (seen it twice now) or any other iDevice unless you’re using it to keep track of others in your group. Even then, a tablet computer at a theme park makes for a tempting steal even for the casual thief.
Besides, those green pigs will still be there to knock down with those exploding birds…
So let’s say you still didn’t listen to my insider tips and tricks, and you STILL brought all your crap with you inside the park. To help with the glut of loose items you might still have despite our warnings, the best parks offer semi-secure bins or shelves to place your items in while riding. But beware! The parks’ are not responsible for anything lost, stolen or damaged. It’s a gamble every time you ride – whether or not you come back to find your items all still there.
Even worse, several park chains are now requiring that you place all your loose items in PAY PER USE lockers just before you ride. Personally, I feel like if that’s the case, why not just charge guests for each time they ride, rather than a flat admission at the front of the park. But, there’s a little trick to save you a few bucks each time you ride.
In order to “beat” these systems, and save you a handful of money that you shouldn’t have to have spent in the first place, I recommend that you wear cargo shorts, preferably with zippered or double buttoned pockets.
Some parks have closer lots than others, so take it into consideration when packing for the day.
As silly as it sounds, these pants can be a real money-saver at parks. They allow you to ride any attraction knowing your items are safe and secure, while at the same time not forcing you to put items in a $1.00 single use locker! On our last trip to Six Flags Great America, we saved nearly $10.00 in locker fees per person, saving our group nearly $50.00 for the day. (That’s more than the price of a single admission!)
Wearing sandals of any kind is also a big no-no, despite how hot the day might become. Sandals are easily lost on rides, extremely painful to walk several miles around a park in and expose you to all sorts of nasty things found on park pathways. A good pair of sneakers will keep you comfortable (and clean) all day.
In our next adventure…the big day finally arrives – now what?!?
Great American Thrills® 