In light of the closure of Fear:VR at Canada’s Wonderland, Great America and Knott’s – after a protest from the President of the Orange County chapter of the National Alliance of Mental Health – a person who admitted he never actually experienced the attraction for himself – Great American Thrills is proud to present to you five more offensive rides that should be shut down, torn down and never spoken of again.
(If you haven’t already gathered, this is all sarcasm – please be offended if you did not get the joke already).
1.) Seven Dwarfs Mine Train, Walt Disney World
Offends: Little People
As our good friend Eric the Actor from the Howard Stern Show always used to say, the correct term is “Little People.” Who thought to name a ride after seven height-challenged people, and then make then sing as if they were merry? Oh – it was a famous KIDS movie? So we’ve inoculated our children that it’s okay to say this, too?!?
2.) The Demon, Great America
Offends: Church-going folk
Sadly, this is the only one on our list that played out in real life. Turns out back in the 1980’s, people were not down with the idea of theming a coaster after a devil-like apparition that was eating guests randomly. Thankfully, people got over themselves and not only is the ride still around – but it tweets, too!
3.) All water rides
Seriously – how can you in good conscious place all that water around a log and let people float in it? What a disgusting insult to people who fear water…
4.) Gold Striker & Gold Rusher, Great America & Six Flags Magic Mountain
Offends: Mine Workers
How can either of these roller coasters accurately portray the savage life endured by miners, all in the search for rare minerals…they should be ashamed of themselves.
5.) Top Thrill Dragster, Cedar Point
Offends: Decent people
Have you seen that thing? It looks like a giant wanker. A hot dog. A gentleman’s “special region.” We can’t have our kids grow up in a world like this…
You see how slippery this slope is? If you don’t like something about a park – just do what everyone else does – don’t support it. Don’t impose your beliefs on them, it only makes you part of the problem…
It’s the day after Christmas – and you didn’t get what you wanted, did you? That ugly sweater, socks or worse – underwear!
Have no fear – we’ve got you covered…
Give the gift of an experience that they won’t soon forget – a ticket to the world premiere of ACE’s “The Legacy of Arrow Development,” presented by the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk!
Tickets are just $10, with a $10 upgrade available if you’d like priority seating, reception and Q&A with the filmmakers. You can purchase your tickets here or at the Montgomery Theater Box Office.
We’ll see you in your best suits and dresses on the evening of January 23rd!
After flying in yesterday and adjusting to the time change (best as you can) I’m ready to start writing down my thoughts – with some leftover pizza and a Blue Moon at my side.
Today, I was able to visit the Orange County Convention Center for the first time, to help set up the ACE booth as well as pick up my badge for the big IAAPA exhibition. For the first time, was able to see incredible scope of the event. As big as you might think it is – think BIGGER. Of course, the floor isn’t even finished as I type – so it’ll only feel larger by this time tomorrow.
Afterwards, I had lunch with American Coaster Enthusiasts President (and roommate for the week) Jerry Willard – that’s when he brought up his afternoon / evening plans…a trip to the Magic Kingdom.
I bit. It’s been 20 years since I last visited Florida (for Disney World with my family). And boy, was the trip out there today worth it.
Turns out, not only was the “Mickey’s Very Merry Christmas Party” significantly less crowded than it was during the day (the park closed at 7 to the general public), they gave you all the cookies and hot cocoa you could down AND it was CHEAPER to get in, too. Every ride was either a walk on or well under 30 minutes.
If you don’t mind Christmas being jammed down your throat a little too early, this is a great way to experience the Magic Kingdom at breakneck pace, yet still get everything in, too.
Oh, and the fireworks were incredible as well 🙂
Day Two has technically already arrived, so expect a blog post late Monday night. Until next time, everyone!
Disneyland has a problem. And it’s the best problem to ever have if you’re a business – too many people want to come visit you than you have room for.
Boo freakedy hoo.
So it should come as no surprise today that both Florida and California parks announced sweeping changes to their annual passholder programs, most notably eliminating the premium pass.
Now, before you start complaining about how high the prices are – take a minute to think about this: Disneyland in particular has become nearly unmanageable when it comes to crowds. Even days that were traditionally lighter have all but disappeared – as AP’s tend to visit those days. As a result, the overall experience of the park has lowered.
Now here’s where it gets interesting – buried deep in the Disney website is an interesting line: “Limited number of passes available…” Yup – there’s a limit to how many passes will be sold. Will you know when they’re low? What if you usually upgrade later in 2016?!? All legitimate questions right now.
Here’s some more turkey legs for thought: Disneyland was never designed to be a “season pass park.” They’re really brought this problem onto themselves by not limiting AP sales or keeping their prices so low that so many could afford them. The park was meant to be for a special occasion – maybe once a year or so. You can’t combine the tourist crowds with those who visit everyday and think the level of service and satisfaction will be the same.
It’s simple supply and demand – too many people want something, there isn’t enough supply (capacity) so the only way to lower the crowds it is to make it harder to afford it.
What do you think? Is a $1000 too much to ask for for an annual pass? Tell me in the comment section below or on my social media links!
Following suit of it’s Florida parks, Disneyland today unveiled several changes to it’s pricing that has set the internet fandom ablaze with anger.
Single day, single park ticket prices were raised $4.00, to $96.00 per person over the age of 10. In addition, most park hopper tickets and annual passes were raised around 10% across the board.
Now, I’ve written before about the increases at Disney World – and how they’re actually a bargain when you consider the fact that Disney bundles their services, unlike other parks that charge separately for everything. (Think airline fares). But, Disney also dropped a bomb on SoCal residents, saying they won’t be selling any NEW Annual Passes to Southern California residents this year.
Why only Southern California? Because Disneyland has for years, offered discounted passes to residents of specific zip codes in the area. (Call it a “Sorry for interrupting your dinner with fireworks every night” discount). Effectively, the Resort needs to somehow mitigate the already large crowds in their parks. But, is this the best way to do it? Here’s my thoughts:
Firstly, there’s only have one person to blame for this problem of gluttony…Disney Marketing Executives.
Years ago, Disneyland was a destination resort – a place you went to once in a great while. My family always joked, “We’re due back for a trip to Disneyland, it’s been 10 years.
However, the culture has changed – and Disneyland tried to adapt with it. The park is now popular with two separate and very different clientele: the Annual Passholder and the Destination Tourist. Disney plays to these uber fans (and you have to be to pay $700 a year to go to the park) with merchandise, discounts and even conferences (D23). When you combine those two different types of people at a park, you get crowds. Lots and lots of crowds.
Gone are the days of “slower” operations – because the AP’s go on those days to avoid the tourists. When the kids are out of school, the AP’s stay away because the tourists are in the park en masse.
What a perfect “problem” to have!
Now, generally, Disneyland has some of the fastest, most efficient operations in the world when it comes to pumping people through rides. But there’s only so much you can do when the park is at capacity – during the middle of the week. At a certain point, you just can’t bring more people into the park.
So, what would be my solution? Eliminate the discount on Southern California passes. The difference in cost can be easily made up by those who will undoubtedly renew their pass, year after year, despite any price increases.
Or, go back to ticket books and limit the number of people allowed into the park on any given day. Basically, don’t guarantee admission until you’re in the park. The earlier people get there, the more they’re going to spend, anyway.
Folks, Disneyland is a fantastic place to have a few days of fun. The real secret to the magic – is that you have to pay up front, to not worry about anything else once you’re inside. So suck it up…the State of California isn’t making operating a park in the state any cheaper – so guess who gets to pay the difference…you guessed it – you and me.